This memorial website was created
in the memory of my honey, Tom Tabala
who was born in New York on June 11, 1952
and passed away on November 17, 2004
at the age of 52. I will love him forever.

    









 


          

   




If I could have one lifetime wish,
A dream that would come true;
I'd pray to God with all my heart
For yesterday and you.

A thousand words wont bring you back,
I know because I've tried.
Neither will a thousand tears,
I know because I've cried.

You left behind my broken heart,
And happy memories too.
But I never wanted memories,
I only wanted you















   






      

     


          
             I wish you would not be afraid to speak my loved one's name. They lived and were important, and I need to hear their name.

If I cry and get emotional if we talk about my loved one, I wish you knew that it isn't because you hurt me; the fact that they died causes my tears. You have allowed me to cry and I thank you. Crying and emotional outbursts are healing.

I will have emotional highs and lows, ups and downs. I wish you wouldn't think that if I have a good cry my grief is over, or that if I have a bad day I need psychiatric counseling.

I wish you wouldn't expect my grief to be over in six months. The first few years are going to be exceedingly traumatic for me. As with alcoholics, I will never be "cured" or a "formerly bereaved", but forevermore be recovering from the bereavement.

I wish you'd understand the physical reaction to grief. I may gain weight, lose weight, sleep all the time or not at all, develop a host of illnesses and be accident prone, all of which are related to my grief.

My loved one's birthday, the anniversary of their death and the holidays can be terrible times for me. I wish you would tell me that you are thinking of me and them on these days. And if I am not in touch and withdrawn, just know that I am thinking about them and don't try to coerce me into being cheerful.

I wish you wouldn't offer to take me out for a drink, or to a party, this is just a temporary crutch and the only way I can get through this grief is to experience it. I have to hurt before I can heal.

I wish you'd understand that grief changes people. I am not the same person I was before my honey died and I am a different person with no dreams or hope to look forward to. Please try to get to know me--I am the one who'll be here from now on.

-Author Unknown- 


         

   

If tears could build a stairway,
And memories were a lane,
I would walk right up to heaven
To bring you home again. 

 
   
       
   


   





  



              
               



    















Tom, His Brothers and His Sister
This is the only picture we have with all of Tom's
brothers and his sister together. We lost Robert
shortly after this picture was taken
and then Tom 15 month later 




















               



















                   



 Family  

Those who share laughter, joy and sorrow,
Those who share memories, hopes and tomorrows,
Not bound just by ties at birth,
But by our journeys on this earth




  

       
         
                    

         


         

 
 








































In Loving Memory
Of Tom & Robert

Something will remind me
I never know just when,
might be something someone says
and it all comes back again

The times we spent together
The happiness, the fun,
Once again I feel the pain
Of life without my Sons

It's said that time's a healer
I’m not sure this is true,
There's not a day goes by my Sons
That I don't cry for you both 




      
            
 











              

































Look at this one of Bub's Rockets and
He is wearing your sunglasses.

Your Favorite Show
of All Time

This will be you and I one day together again
dancing to the disco music from Saturday
Night Fever. Tell Uncle Cookie that yes I will
dance with him also.
I miss you so much honey.








You are the light that shines so bright
You're in my heart where I hold you tight.
Someday we will be together in the light.

































Tom loved all types of sports but his passion was Football.
Below is a response that Tom’s Football Coach posted on a local web site when he heard of Tom’s death.
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It had been a great holiday season until I read this. Tommy was the League MVP in 1968, he could and did whatever he wanted to on the field.
Ran and threw TDs, Intercepted passes, snapped the ball on punts, then ran downfield and made the tackle. When his team was tied late in a game that meant the B/Q Champ. the coach told quarterback Quinn "I don't care what play you call ,just make sure Tabala gets the ball."
One play, 60 yds later Greenpoint became undeafeated Champs.
I would like his family to understand how grateful I am for knowing this Cool-handed Crusader.
Just as he is still your Son, brother, friend and teammate to me 38 years later he is still one of my kids.

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And so began the Greatest of All Time
Tom Tabala